Happy New Years Eve!
I seriously can't believe tomorrow is January 1st. for the longest time I thought thursday was the 1st. whoops thats what happens when you lose all sense of time here in Haiti!
I must say that this has been a crazy fast year full of unexpected changes.
I am thankful for this year.
I am in awe of the things God has done in my life in 2013. If you asked me this time last year if I would be living in Haiti I would have said, "ummm what?" (with a giggle)
I have learned more about myself then ever before. The good & the bad. He is showing me my heart is bigger then I imagined & refining the doubt that I carry around about myself. With Him by my side I am learning that I can do anything, the desires of my heart were put there for a reason, my trust & faith are expanding as I step out into a new direction. 
February: I flew to Haiti for the first time, first missions trip, and first 3rd world experience. But it wouldn't be my last time on this island. God opened not only my eyes but my heart, to the broken world around me and to His enormous love for me. I went home to MPLS wrecked in so many ways & with uncontrollable tears.
April: I quit my job, packed up my life once again, and moved to Kansas City. I accepted a position teaching summer school to kindergartners, back in Haiti, who would soon melt my heart & show me more about myself. I was able to spend 2 months with my sister and her new son, Jude. This was an amazing time solidifying our relationship and learning from her as she is an amazing mother & wife.
June: Packed up everything I could into 2 large suitcases, said my "see you laters" and boarded a plane to Port au Prince for the summer. I met my best friends that day, God knew what He was doing when He brought us all together to teach. Jordan, Brandy & Lauren helped me through the ups and downs of everyday life in Haiti, they are some of the strongest daughters of Christ that I have met and cease to amaze me everyday in following the Lord. I met 15 beautiful wide eyed, bright smiles that changed my life & soaked up the love that God poured out of my heart. Everyday had its challenges yet I, undeservingly, had so much joy poured into my life. 
July: Flew back to spend the 4th of July with my family in good ol' Branson, Missouri. It was full of laughter, poopy diapers & amazing memories. I love my family and am so thankful for their love and support. They spur me on in ways I never imagined & are the best role models to have in my life. After the week of delicious food & AC I went back to Haiti to finish teaching. The feeling of being "home" here in Haiti amazes me every time I walk out of that airport through all my moves, this is the place God has given me to call my home. God also planted a seed in my heart when He brought me into Esai & Esley's life. That experience allowed me to further see the enormous problem in maternity care. I gained a godson, a family that will forever be in my life, and a new desire to explore and surrender to God. 
August: Teaching ended with a day spent at the beach. NEVER have I ever seen so many smiles, giggles & joy. That day will always be so vivid as I know those children deserved it more then anything. I went and spent a week with a ministry that is building a beautiful home for those children without parents, up in Gonaivés. I loved getting out of PAP and seeing new beautiful areas that Haiti has to offer. I came back and spent a week at Heartline, an amazing ministry that has a maternity program. I gave depo shots, found babies heartbeats & yearned to loved the women of Haiti. That week was a pivotal one as I felt God changing my desires & I committed my future to doing His will. I flew home with tears but excitement & pulled off surprising my sister. 
September: I was back to being a "Coanny" a cooking nanny : ) My sister and I spent 2 weeks doing the Daniel fast together, seeking Gods guidance for my life here serving in Haiti. After those 2 weeks God showed me how I was going to get back to Haiti by taking a position at a new Womens Ministry in Delmas 31. I spent valuable time with Anna, Isaac & Jude giggling and being their silly auntie emmy. My relationships in Kansas City grew as there were bonds created that only God could have planned. I am thankful for all the amazing women God has put in my life to look up to & to come to broken with tears. 
October: My family, who is amazing in so many ways, bought me a plane ticket to visit Jordan and Brandy in Florida for my 23rd birthday. That week many memories were made, I continued to form a strong bond with these new women in my life & learned all about Florida football. I am so thankful for these women in my life, no matter how far apart we live I know that God is going to bless these relationships. I flew back to KC and the next morning got right back on a plane and went to spend a week with my brother and his family in San Diego. I love visiting my family as I met my new baby cousin Lily, spent time with my other cousin Kersti (please pray that she will come and visit me in haiti : ) and laughed with my brother, Katherine & their 2 beautiful children. Flew back to finish the month out with a superhero birthday/halloween party on 17th Street accompanied by the incredibles, candy & an amazing community of friends.
November: Packed up the van with the WHOLE family, all my stuff (which was an adventure going through everything in itself) and drove to Texas to spend the week with my parents. We celebrated Thanksgiving & Christmas by decorating the Christmas tree and cooking all my favorite dishes. I said my "see you laters" yet again to my sister and her family. This time I was packing up most of my life into 6 suitcases, which you couldn't even see the floor. My dad and I boarded a plan & headed back to Haiti. I am so thankful for the relationship that was healed between my father and I. I am truly my fathers daughter : ) To be back in hot, dusty & beautiful Haiti made this whole year worth living out of a suitcase. 
December: Through the many struggles in working for a new ministry, God used this time to draw me closer to Him. I have never felt more peace in my life and little worry about what the future holds for me as I know God is making a way for me. God brought people into my life who included me in this holiday season, which I am thankful for. As I write this blog I am waiting to go up to St. Marc to spend NYE with an amazing family who have made me feel so welcomed & loved. Reflections:
I am always amazed at how God never gave up on me during those years where I denied Him in so many ways. I love who I am in Him. That my identity is HIS DAUGHTER. To be at a place in life where He is guiding my footsteps daily. This year has not been easy but I have grown & learned more then I have in the last 23 years of my life, yet I have a feeling that 2014 is going to bring much more growth & new experiences. With that I would like to tell you that God has continued to change my life, my desires, and my calling…
As this summer, God planted a seed in my heart about how to serve the women of Haiti. To end mothers giving up their children, He revealed that it is so important to create that bond between newborn child and momma. With that He introduced midwifery into my life and after countless prayers, research & questions I believe that this is the calling God has put on my heart. To be with women through the ups and downs of their pregnancies, show them the love God has for us and how that falls onto our love for our children. Teach them of how amazing our bodies are that God gave us & to understand they are a sanctuary that God gifted us with and we need to take care and love ourself.
This past week, after praying relentlessly, fasting & listening to God, I took a new position at a ministry that serves that purpose to the women of Haiti. I will be moving up to Thomassin 32 (an hour drive up in the mountains from where I am now) the end of January. I will begin this new life of midwifery as it will be a long journey but one that will produce fruit in so many ways. I will be working with a fellow Minnesotan, Rhyan, who has lived here 6 years on and off, has a beautiful 2 year old sassy girl & adopting another child this coming month. Espwa Berlancia is a ministry with several services but all of them point to keeping families together. I will be helping with the maternity program that brings food, prenatal care & education to those women who are pregnant. They are all sponsored by people (could that be you?) through their pregnancies which will in turn allow them the proper care for themselves and their babies, as well as delivering in a safe & clean clinic where we, Rhyan and I will be assisting the local doctor in delivering babies! WHAT?! I am going to deliver babies. I am so thrilled and full of excitement to be learning hands on. God had this plan all along! I will also be fostering malnourished babies back to life so they can go back with their families, as I would never want to take a child away from their mom. I know God had planned for Rhyan and I to work together as our desires & dreams are almost the same, which I can't wait to see where He takes us & this ministry. This is a lot to take in I know, but I know this is Gods desire for my heart & my life. I couldn't imagine a better way of serving the women and children of Haiti then to be there when new life is born into this world, to surrender that life to God, their true Father.
Please pray that God will bring a smooth moving & transition as I will be really living in Haiti, immersed in this culture & that the language will stick in my brain!
I am so thankful for each and everyone of you who has followed along on this journey with me. I know I have learned that following God doesnt alway just lead to one place and clearly that is very true with me as I feel like I am always moving. I know deep down in my heart, in this peace that God has gifted me, that being a midwife is what I have been being prepared for. That it is not about me and what I can do, but about what God can use me for here in Haiti and in the lives of these beautiful souls who need Him so badly.
More info will be posted later, but its NYE and I want you to reflect on the past year, what God has taught you. How He has molded you, refined you & sifted you. The rich experiences, new perspectives and understanding you have gained. He is Love. He is our Teacher. He is our Protector. He is our Father. He is Everything to us and I pray that you can see that in every moment of this last year and will experience it in every moment of this new year to come.
My life is so much fuller with God guiding it. My life is so much easier with the support that I receive from each and everyone of you.
Thank You.
May God bless you in this new year. 2014 is going to be an amazing year.
I pray that you will come and visit me here in Haiti. That God might just be planting a seed in your heart of new ways to serve Him.
"Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; He will neither fail you nor abandon you." Deuteronomy 31:8
In Christ's Love
E
