To let it consume me.
Devour my confidence.
Control my every move.
Fear is not of God.
There is no where in the Bible that says that God has a spirit of fear.
He tells us to fear Him.
" and remember that the Heavenly Father to whom you pray has no favorites. He will judge or reward you according to what you do. So you must live in reverent fear of Him during your time a "foreigners in the land."" 1 Peter 1:17
I have always had fear of my future.
Will I ever meet my husband and get married.
Will I be able to pay my bills.
Will I ever be a mom, one of the things that my heart desires the most.
Will I be able to lose that 10 pounds.
Will they like me.
Will they approve of me.
Will, will, will.
God promises He hears us. He knows our hearts. Our desires.
HE WILL. and He can.
I have found a new fear that is taking root in my heart.
One that I don't want to welcome or have it become a part of me.
Fear of people and their judgements on my life in Christ and the way I live.
Am I doing something wrong?
passes through my head more times then I would like that phrase to.
Fear that I am going to mess up. Do something wrong in their eyes.
Or their rules.
Their way they think life should be lived.
I have let it consume my spirit.
and I am exhausted.
God is not of fear.
So why do I fear so much of screwing up.
Of making mistakes.
" through Christ you have come to trust in God. And you have placed your faith and hope in God because he raised Christ from the dead and gave Him great glory. You were cleansed from our sins when you obeyed the trust so now you must show sincere love to each other as brothers and sisters. Love each other deeply with all your heart." 1 Peter 1:21-22
That is why His perfect son poured out His crimson blood for all those times I have and I will sin. Cause I am going to.
But I see my life changing and a deep desire to choose to do right thing.
tucking that inside my heart is something I need to unfold daily.
I love how God called me, redeemed me, and is healing me.
I am not perfect. I will never be.
But I am not striving to be perfect for anyone else's sake except for Jesus.
To be like Him.
To be His love.
His Hands. His feet.
His heart.
His forgiveness.
my life would be
n.o.t.h.i.n.g.
without His blood.
Fear.
a 4 letter word that captures so many of us.
" we were ransomed... not with perishable things such as silver or gold, but with the precious blood of Christ." 1 Peter 1:18-19
His rules are what we should follow.
His words.
His truth.
His heart.
"fear of the Lord means we don't have to fear anything else." (She reads truth 1&2 Peter study)
I am learning to fear the Lord vividly in my life. By asking Him to convict my heart when I am in the wrong. When I am not being what He desires of my spirit.
To not live up to peoples expectations they have of me.
But to live up to Gods expectations He has for my life right here, right now.
To go against this fear.
I want to serve Him in a way that has given me fear.
BEING BOLD in His name.
this is something I want to release to Him.
why hold Him in. I want others to see that there is something in my spirit that is not of this world.
That can ONLY come from God.
~ I pray that He brings girls into my life who have come to selling their bodies to survive. I pray for those who are pregnant that God would entrust them into my care as a midwife. That I can love them through this season in their lives.
~ I desire to reach out to those who are always asking for money for their grumbling tummies. What is 10 pesos to me compared to what 10 pesos is to them. To love them by filling their stomachs and praying that God will be seen in something Jesus so easily did to thousands.
" He brings us out of a life of ordinary, life-stealing fear and into a relationship with an awe-inspiring, life-transforming Savior." (she reads truth 1&2 Peter study)
I am not going to waste my time here worrying about what people think I should do.
Who they think I should be and how they think I should act.
God tells me that. Convicts me. Allows me.
To receive forgiveness for when I screw up.
To want to put a smile on His face everyday.
I want my life to be worthy to Him.
So away with fear.
I am done being held back.
I want to live this one life to the fullest.
To get to those gates of gold and hear my Father say He is proud of me.
I posted this song before.
But it just rings so true.
Keep this in your heart. Sing these words. Proclaim this truth.
we are NO LONGER slaves to fear.
WE ARE CHILDREN OF GOD.
In Christ's Freeing Love
Emily Elizabeth
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